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Good Morning, ! Today is Tuesday, May 1 I wonder how many of you actually created one of those blooming onions? Anita suggested to use an apple corer and punch it 3/4 of the way down the center, then use a small spoon to cut and break it out. After that it is easy to cut the slices with a Ginsu knife or any thin bladed knife. Putting the cut onion into ice water for an hour will open it up nicely. For the batter Anita suggests whatever you use for pancakes and then dust it with curly-fries spice. For those of you who don't know how to mix curly-fries spice: Salt, pepper, roasted garlic and peppers, dill, basil, and a bit of chili powder. You can get it at the Bulk Barn for under a dollar a pound. Like me, a number of subscribers balk at deep frying because of the high cost. Putting the battered and dusted onion high into a preheated oven apparently works quite well. Enjoy! Ophelia
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Here is ONE joke of the type you get in the 2 cent per day version. ($10 / year, $1 / month) The full version also has other goodies. Have you been good enough to deserve 2 cents per day? Treat yourself to the FULL VERSION!
Three Italian nuns die and go to Heaven, where they are met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter. He says "Sisters, you all led such wonderful lives that I'm granting you six months to go back to Earth and be anyone you want to be. The first nun says, "I want to be Sophia Loren," and, POOF, she's gone. The second says, "I want to be Madonna," and, POOF, she's gone. The third says, "I want to be Virginia Pipalini." St. Peter looks perplexed. "Who?" he inquires. "Virginia Pipalini," replies the nun. St. Peter shakes his head and says, "I'm sorry, but that name just doesn't ring a bell." The nun then takes a newspaper out of her habit and hands it to St. Peter. He reads the paper and starts laughing. He hands it back to her and says, "No, sister, the paper says it was the 'Virginia pipeline' that was laid by 1,400 men in 6 months."
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RECIPE SECTION, thanks to Sr Anna DORM style muffins The recipe is in the 2 cents per day version. Do you know somebody, who can afford 2 cents per day or $10 per year? Happy Appetite! Sr Anna
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Good Morning, ! Today is Monday, April 30 Thanks Dwayne! Thanks Sr Anna for sending me an "Outback Blooming Onion" recipe. I don't think that is the only one out there, 24 oz of beer sounds a bit much. I think I will try that with dark flavorful rye flour and an egg and a couple of spoonfuls Olive oil instead of white flour and beer, but of course with all the spices. And since I am not about to use that much fat or oil for deep frying, I'll wrap it in alu foil and bake it high in the oven. I have a hunch my low-budget Blooming Onion will taste just fine. Dwayne sent this: Ophelia, My daughter helps one of her friends make those blooming onions at some of the festivals during the summer. This is what she told me about making them. We have a special cutter that blooms the onion open. They then put it upside down in a pan of wet batter. They use drakes batter. I have seen it at the grocery store. They just add water and their own spices to it. I have seen blooming onion batter at the store too. Anyway while the onion is submerged upside down in the batter they use their fingers to open up the petals to make sure it all gets covered. They then try to keep the onion opened a bit as they take it out of the batter and drop it in the fryer upside down. They cook it till it is a nice golden brown. I found this video about the blooming onion on you tube. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FB3mPbBafbA B. Buckley sent yet another version, also without beer. That version is available from Amazon.com for $10.20 If you are interested, I'll send you the link. Enjoy! Ophelia
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Here is ONE joke of the type you get in the 2 cent per day version. ($10 / year, $1 / month) The full version also has other goodies. Have you been good enough to deserve 2 cents per day? Treat yourself to the FULL VERSION!
There was a city boy who had just moved into the country. He went walking around to check out his surroundings and found a farmer selling chickens. The city boy went over to the farmer to see how much he was selling them for. The farmer asked him if he wanted a male or a female. The city boy asked for both. So the farmer said, "Here you go, one cock and one pull-it." The city boy confused asked him what he meant. The farmer said, "A cock is a male chicken and a pull-it is a female chicken." The city boy said, "Oh," and went on his way with two chickens one under each arm. A bit further down the road he saw a donkey for sale. He went to the man who was selling it to find out how much it was. The man said, "The ass is 15 dollars." The city boy replied, "No, I want the donkey out side in your yard." The man just said, "That's an ass." The city boy, new to these terms, just said, "Oh." and bought the donkey. As he was leaving the man yelled out, "Wait, the ass gets a bit stubborn about going over hills, so you have to scratch him behind the ears to get him going again." So the city boy is going back home and the donkey stops dead in its tracks and he can't get it to move. He can't scratch its ear because he would have to drop one of the chickens and it would run away. So the city boy starts to fuss and yell at the donkey. While he is doing this a beautiful women walks up and asks him if he needs help. The city boy thinks, hey why don't I try to impress this beautiful women by using my new slang terms that I learned today. So the city boy turns to the woman and says, "Yeah, could you hold my cock and pull-it while I scratch my ass?"
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RECIPE SECTION, thanks to Sr Anna Yogurt Oatmeal Muffins The recipe is in the 2 cents per day version. Do you know somebody, who can afford 2 cents per day or $10 per year? Happy Appetite! Sr Anna
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Ophelia
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Good Morning, ! Today is Sunday, April 29 Thanks to Sig I got a fairly thick Eye Of Round steak for $2.65. I tried Dwayn'e suggesttion of folding it into alu foil. The result was an English style steamed steak, uniformly white throughout, and rather dry. I won't repeat that method. With my method, misting the grill with olive oil, putting the spiced and hammered steak in when the grill is good and hot, covering the lid with a large oven mitt and putting light pressure on it for a minute, then rotating the steak 90 degrees, not flipping it, just turning it clockwise, and putting light pressure on it for another 60 seconds. That gives me a slightly charred surface, a thin streak of pink in the center, and a flavorful, juicy steak like you get at The Keg or the Outback. I have not been to any of those places for ages, but I remember. I still remember the first time I was at an Outback and saw their "Blooming Onion". If anybody knows how to make those, please tell us! Enjoy! Ophelia
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Here is ONE joke of the type you get in the 2 cent per day version. ($10 / year, $1 / month) The full version also has other goodies. Have you been good enough to deserve 2 cents per day? Treat yourself to the FULL VERSION!
Jane went to the bank and applied for a loan. "I want a loan, I'm going to divorce my husband." "Oh, we don't give loans for divorces" the manager says "We make loans for appliances, automobiles, businesses, home improvements...." Jane interrupts and says "Well, this is certainly a 'Home Improvement.'
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RECIPE SECTION, thanks to Sr Anna Rapid Fish Recipe The recipe is in the 2 cents per day version. Do you know somebody, who can afford 2 cents per day or $10 per year? Happy Appetite! Sr Anna
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Ophelia
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Good Morning, ! Today is Saturday, April 28 Thank you, Sig! ---------------------------------Looks like Egyptians are clawing back towards barbarism. Can't handle civilization. I'm glad most of us don't hae to live there! Enjoy! Ophelia
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Two ladies were sitting at the bridge table, discussing the men they had married. "I swear," said the one woman, "I don't know how I could have done any better. He takes care of the yard, minds the children while I do laundry, and if I'm not feeling good, he'll even do the wash!" The second woman said, "Sounds like you DID get a good husband! Harold and I married for better or for worse. He couldn't have done better, and I couldn't have done worse!"
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A man is showering up in a locker room with his buddy when he notices his friend has a huge penis. "Damn Bob, you're hung!" Jim exclaims. "I wasn't always this impressive, I had to work for it." "What do you mean?" Jim asked. "Well, everyday for the past two years I've spent an hour each night rubbing it with butter. I know it sounds crazy but it actually made it grow 4 inches! You should try it." Jim agrees and the two say good bye. A few weeks later the two are in the same locker room and Bob asks Jim how his situation was. Jim replied" "I did what you said but my penis has actually gotten smaller! I lost two inches already!" "Did you do everything I told you? An hour each day with butter?" "Well, butter is expensive, so I've been using Crisco." "Crisco?!?" Bob exclaimed, "You idiot! Crisco's shortening!"
A police officer came upon a terrible wreck where the driver and passenger had been killed. As he looked upon the wreckage a little monkey came out of the brush and hopped around the crashed car. The officer looked down at the monkey and said "I wish you could talk." The monkey looked up at the officer and shook his head up and down. "You can understand what I'm saying?" asked the officer. Again, the monkey shook his head up and down. "Well, did you see this?" "Yes," motioned the monkey. "What happened?" The monkey pretended to have a can in his hand and turned it up by his mouth. "They were drinking?" asked the officer. "Yes." "What else?" The monkey pinched his fingers together and held them to his mouth. "They were smoking marijuana?" "Yes." "What else?" The monkey motioned "Screwing." "They were screwing, too?" asked the astounded officer. "Yes." "Now wait, you're saying your owners were drinking, smoking and screwing before they wrecked the car?" "Yes." "What were you doing during all this?" "Driving" ....motioned the monkey.
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For clean, family safe humor and tech tips,
try the newsletter of my friend and coach, Dear Webby Dear Webby's Humor Letter |
A guy walks into a brothel and tells the madam he wants six girls for the evening. The next morning the madam informs the gentleman that there will be no charge. Very happy, he leaves. A few days later he returns, and again tell the madam that he would like six girls for the evening. In the morning the madam presents him with a bill for $1,000. Confused the man asks, "I don't understand, on Tuesday it was free." "That's right," replies the madam, "but on Tuesdays we're on cable..."
RECIPE SECTION, thanks to Sr Anna Yummy Sorbet using Mangos (diabetic friendly) Ingredients: 2 pounds mangoes 1/4 cup fresh orange juice Sugar substitute equal to 1 teaspoon sugar Directions: Peel and slice mangoes; puree in a food processor fitted with steel blade. Add orange juice and sweetener; mix well. Pour into a shallow pan; freeze mixture until solid. Remove sorbet from freezer; break into pieces with a fork. Return to food processor and process 10 seconds until smooth and frosty. Spoon into footed glasses and serve immediately. Makes three 1/2 cup servings Happy Appetite! Sr Anna
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Good Morning, ! Today is Friday, April 27 Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!Fog and rain, second day in a row. Some people look a lot grouchier in this weather, but it does not bother me. Because of the fog I have to drive slower, which saves me gas. Wonder why nobody can drive the speed limit, when it is not foggy? One more foggy, gas saving day and I'll have a steak this weekend and try Dwayne's suggestion of putting the steak wrapped in alu foil into the GeorgeForeman Griller, and see how that comes out. Enjoy! Ophelia
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Here is ONE joke of the type you get in the 2 cent per day version. ($10 / year, $1 / month) The full version also has other goodies. Have you been good enough to deserve 2 cents per day? Treat yourself to the FULL VERSION!
I was behind an attractive woman in the checkout line at the local store. She was questioning the store's policy on returns. She pointed to a very sheer, sexy, lacy red-and-black negligee she had put on the check out counter to purchase. and asked, "Can I bring this back if it doesn't work?"
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For clean, family safe humor and tech tips,
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RECIPE SECTION, thanks to Sr Anna Italian White bean Soup (diabetic friendly) The recipe is in the 2 cents per day version. Do you know somebody, who can afford 2 cents per day or $10 per year? Happy Appetite! Sr Anna
What Smart Car?
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Please help me stay online! |
See ya tomorrow!
Ophelia
ophelia@dingbatter.com
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