Marines rescue Taliban Sex Slaves 
Sunday, January 8, 2012, 04:47 AM
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
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Good Morning, !

Today is Sunday, January 8

Two more days, and my second job will be finished.
I sure am going to welcome the free time, but not the
reduced income.

Enjoy!
Ophelia



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Here is ONE joke of the type you get in the 
2.7 cent per day version. ($10 / year, $1 / month)
The full version also has other goodies. 


Have you been good enough to deserve 2.7 cents per day?
Treat yourself to the FULL VERSION!




Little Jimmie's mother decided to tell him all about making babies, so
she had "the talk" with him.

Afterwards Little Jimmie just sat there silently for awhile.

"Do you understand?" his mother asked.

"Yes," replied Little Jimmie.

"Do you have any questions?" asked his Mother.

"Yes, how about little kittens and puppies?" asked 
Little Jimmie.

"In exactly the same way as  with babies", answered his Mom. "Wow!"
Little Jimmie exclaimed. "My daddy will fuck ANYTHING!"




Marines free taliban Sex Slaves




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Enjoy!
Ophelia

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Ophelia Dingbatter
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Enough for today!
See ya tomorrow!
Ophelia
ophelia@dingbatter.com

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No dentist appointment 
Saturday, January 7, 2012, 02:26 AM
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
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Good Morning, !

Today is Saturday, January 7

Three more days, and my second job will be finished.

Enjoy!
Ophelia



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Here is ONE joke of the type you get in the 
2.7 cent per day version. ($10 / year, $1 / month)
The full version also has other goodies. 


Have you been good enough to deserve 2.7 cents per day?
Treat yourself to the FULL VERSION!




This guy wakes up out of a deep sleep and, feeling 
real horny, nudges his wife awake and asks, "Why 
don't we get it on, eh?" 

She replies, "I have an appointment at the gynecologist 
tomorrow and you know I don't like to make love the night 
before." 

So the husband agrees and rolled back over and 
started to go back to sleep.

A few minutes later, he nudges his wife again and asks, 
"You don't by any chance have a dentist's appointment 
tomorrow, do you?"







Since 1/1/11
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you have to subscribe to the full version.

Since July 1, 2011, the Ophelia Dingbatter's News is 2.7 cents per day,
$1 per month or $10 per year.

Can you afford $1 per month?

To subscribe,
1) If you are not signed up, sign up with the Double-Opt-In Subscriber,

2) Confirm, that your email address CAN receive mail from me,

3) That will get you the free subscption.
If you receive it OK, you can proceed to step #4.
If not, check your spam settings and with your ISP or email processor.
   Do NOT proceed to step #4 until you     
   successfully receive the free subscription!    

If the free subscription gets censored and does not make it through to you,
then the paid version will not make it through either.

   Do NOT complain to me,   
   if your spam setting or your ISP censors your email.  
   There is absolutely NOTHING I can do about what   
   goes on at your ISP or in your computer.  


4) AFTER you have verified, that you CAN receive my newsletter,
THEN you can pay for your subscription to the full version at


You can pay easily and securely with PayPal,
even if you don't have a PayPal account.
Just use your credit or debit card or E-check.

If you want to pay with a paper check, Webby will cash it for me.
Please send it to

Webby, inc
Box 646
Black Diamond, AB T0L 0H0
Canada

Please mark on it somewhere, that it is for Ophelia.
I will add you to the list the moment Webby tells me about
receiving your check.

Enjoy!
Ophelia

If the Subscriber buttons don't work on your browser,
you can accomplish the same with the donate button.

Ophelia Dingbatter
ophelia@dingbatter.com		 Please help me stay online!
Enough for today!
See ya tomorrow!
Ophelia
ophelia@dingbatter.com

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Bad Dog! 
Friday, January 6, 2012, 04:00 AM
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
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Good Morning, !

Today is Friday, January 6
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!



Four more days, and my second job will be finished.
While the people, whom I owe money, liked it, I am going
to feel like I was on vacation, when I am down to just
seventy hours a week. Sure am looking forward to it!

They cleaned the trees and overturned trucks off the streets.
Traffic has returned to normal, but most of us do keep a wary
eye on any tree, that sways in the wind.

Enjoy!
Ophelia


Ophelia Dingbatter 
Please, help me stay online!

	



There is a man in his back yard trying to fly a kite. He 
throws the kite up in the air, the wind catches it for a few 
seconds then it comes crashing back down. He tries this 
a few more times all the while his wife is watching from 
her kitchen window. Muttering to herself how men need 
to be told how to do everything she opens the window and
yells to her husband "You need more tail."

The man turns with a confused look on his face and says, 
"Make up your mind, Honey.  
Last night you told me to go fly a kite...!"





In her own eyes, Esther was the most popular girl around.
"A lot of men are gonna be totally miserable when I marry."

"Really ?" said her date, "And just how many men do you
intend to marry?"




A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. 
"Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here 
tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal 
injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, 
no other excuses whatsoever!"

A smart ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, 
"What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete 
and utter >>sexual exhaustion?"

The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence 
is finally restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes 
her head and sweetly says. "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam 
with your other hand."





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Four old timers were playing their weekly game of
golf, and one remarked how for Christmas this year
he'd love to wake up on Christmas morning, roll out of
bed and without an argument go directly to the golf
course, meet his buddies and play a round.

His buddies all chimed in and said, "Let's do it! We'll
make it a priority, figure out a way and meet here
early on Christmas morning."

Finally, that special morning arrives, and there
they are on the links. The first guy says, "Boy, this
game cost me a fortune! I bought my wife such a
diamond ring that she can't take her eyes off it."

Number 2 guy says, "I spent a ton too. My wife is at
home planning the cruise I gave her. She was up to
her eyeballs in brochures."

Number 3 guy says " Well, my wife is at home
admiring her new car, reading the manual."

They all turn to the last guy in the group and he is
staring at them like they have lost their minds. "I can't
believe you all went to such expense for this golf
game. I patted my wife on the butt and said,
'Well babe, is it sex or golf?' and she said,
'Take an extra sweater, it's probably quite chilly out on
the golf course'."





For clean, family safe humor and tech tips, 
try the newsletter
of my friend and coach, Dear Webby

Dear Webby's Humor Letter





"I'm telling you, Carol, I've never been happier, " Betty told her 
friend. "I have two boyfriends. One is just 
fabulous...handsome,sensitive, caring and considerate." 

What in the world do you need the second one for?" Carol asked?" 

"Oh," Betty replied, "the second one is straight."





One cold January day, a French tourist in Scotland decided
to find out if the natives were as tight as he had heard. He
stopped at a farm cottage, told the farmer's wife he was
freezing to death, and was invited to come in and warm himself
at the hearth. Once inside the house, he complained of being
thirsty. The woman handed him an enormous white crockery mug
filled with milk. After taking a big swig, the guest
exclaimed, "This is sweet and fresh ... you are most generous!"

She replied modestly, "It's nothing. My family wouldn't drink
that milk because we found a dead rat in it."

Sick to his stomach, the Frenchman clapped both hands over
his mouth, allowing the huge mug to fall to the floor and
shatter on the stone floor.

The Scotswoman grabbed her broom, raised it high in the air,
brought it down on the visitor's head, and hollered, "Get out,
you ungrateful pig! I take you in my home, I let you share my
fire, I give you milk to drink ... and now you repay my
kindness by breaking the children's potty chair!"






Bad Dog!


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Dad, how was I born? 
Monday, January 2, 2012, 09:20 PM
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
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Please vote forOphelia Dingbatter! Subscribe 



Good Morning, !
Today is Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Sounds like a nice and rambunctious Chinook outside.
Quite likely I'll find another plastic lawn chair or two 
snagged on my porch railing when I get home.

Enjoy!
Ophelia



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Here is ONE joke of the type you get in the 
2.7 cent per day version. ($10 / year, $1 / month)
The full version also has other goodies. 


Have you been good enough to deserve 2.7 cents per day?
Treat yourself to the FULL VERSION!




"Daddy, how was I born?"

Dad answered: "Ah, my son, I guess one day you will need to
find out anyway!

Well, you see your Mom and I first got together in a chat
room. 

Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at
a cyber-cafe. 

We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to
a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to
upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a
firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete
button, nine months later a blessed little Pop-Up appeared
and said You've Got Male! 









Since 1/1/11
free counters
             Countries
For more than one joke, plus the day's pictures and movie,
you have to subscribe to the full version.

Since July 1, 2011, the Ophelia Dingbatter's News is 2.7 cents per day,
$1 per month or $10 per year.

Can you afford $1 per month?

To subscribe,
1) If you are not signed up, sign up with the Double-Opt-In Subscriber,

2) Confirm, that your email address CAN receive mail from me,

3) That will get you the free subscption.
If you receive it OK, you can proceed to step #4.
If not, check your spam settings and with your ISP or email processor.
   Do NOT proceed to step #4 until you     
   successfully receive the free subscription!    

If the free subscription gets censored and does not make it through to you,
then the paid version will not make it through either.

   Do NOT complain to me,   
   if your spam setting or your ISP censors your email.  
   There is absolutely NOTHING I can do about what   
   goes on at your ISP or in your computer.  


4) AFTER you have verified, that you CAN receive my newsletter,
THEN you can pay for your subscription to the full version at


You can pay easily and securely with PayPal,
even if you don't have a PayPal account.
Just use your credit or debit card or E-check.

If you want to pay with a paper check, Webby will cash it for me.
Please send it to

Webby, inc
Box 646
Black Diamond, AB T0L 0H0
Canada

Please mark on it somewhere, that it is for Ophelia.
I will add you to the list the moment Webby tells me about
receiving your check.

Enjoy!
Ophelia

If the Subscriber buttons don't work on your browser,
you can accomplish the same with the donate button.

Ophelia Dingbatter
ophelia@dingbatter.com		 Please help me stay online!
Enough for today!
See ya tomorrow!
Ophelia
ophelia@dingbatter.com

Please subscribe a friend to the Ophelia Dingbatter News
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Entitlement Crowd 
Sunday, January 1, 2012, 09:18 PM
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
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Please vote forOphelia Dingbatter! Subscribe 



Good Morning, !
Today is Monday, January 2, 2012

Enjoy!
Ophelia



PayPal - The safer, easier way to pay online!





Here is ONE joke of the type you get in the 
2.7 cent per day version. ($10 / year, $1 / month)
The full version also has other goodies. 


Have you been good enough to deserve 2.7 cents per day?
Treat yourself to the FULL VERSION!




Two old ladies were rocking in their chairs on the 
nursing home porch. One says "Martha, do you remember 
the minuet?" 

Martha answers "Heck, I don't even 
remember the ones I slept with."









Since 1/1/11
free counters
             Countries
For more than one joke, plus the day's pictures and movie,
you have to subscribe to the full version.

Since July 1, 2011, the Ophelia Dingbatter's News is 2.7 cents per day,
$1 per month or $10 per year.

Can you afford $1 per month?

To subscribe,
1) If you are not signed up, sign up with the Double-Opt-In Subscriber,

2) Confirm, that your email address CAN receive mail from me,

3) That will get you the free subscption.
If you receive it OK, you can proceed to step #4.
If not, check your spam settings and with your ISP or email processor.
   Do NOT proceed to step #4 until you     
   successfully receive the free subscription!    

If the free subscription gets censored and does not make it through to you,
then the paid version will not make it through either.

   Do NOT complain to me,   
   if your spam setting or your ISP censors your email.  
   There is absolutely NOTHING I can do about what   
   goes on at your ISP or in your computer.  


4) AFTER you have verified, that you CAN receive my newsletter,
THEN you can pay for your subscription to the full version at


You can pay easily and securely with PayPal,
even if you don't have a PayPal account.
Just use your credit or debit card or E-check.

If you want to pay with a paper check, Webby will cash it for me.
Please send it to

Webby, inc
Box 646
Black Diamond, AB T0L 0H0
Canada

Please mark on it somewhere, that it is for Ophelia.
I will add you to the list the moment Webby tells me about
receiving your check.

Enjoy!
Ophelia

If the Subscriber buttons don't work on your browser,
you can accomplish the same with the donate button.

Ophelia Dingbatter
ophelia@dingbatter.com		 Please help me stay online!
Enough for today!
See ya tomorrow!
Ophelia
ophelia@dingbatter.com

Please subscribe a friend to the Ophelia Dingbatter News
Privcy guaranteed by Webby Names and addresses will never be sold or transferred to anybody.
Large Font Version   |  Please vote forOphelia Dingbatter!    |  Subscribe  |  

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