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Ophelia Dingbatter's News NO Sermon here, not for church, just jokes and fun for adults. |
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Good Morning, ! Today is Tuesday, February 7 We got a bit of snow, not enough to force anybody to get out the snow shovels, but enougyh to make everything look clean and pretty. If you know somebody, who would enjoy my jokes, please forward the entire newsletter. With any luck, some people will subscribe! Enjoy! Ophelia
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Here is ONE joke of the type you get in the 2 cent per day version. ($10 / year, $1 / month) The full version also has other goodies. Have you been good enough to deserve 2 cents per day? Treat yourself to the FULL VERSION!
NEWS FLASH! - Austin, Texas West Texas worst air disaster occurred when a small two-seater Cessna 150, piloted by two Texas A&M University students, crashed into a cemetery earlier today in College Station. A & M Corps Member search and rescue workers have recovered 300 bodies so far and expect the number to climb as digging continues into the evening. The pilot and co-pilot survived and are helping in the recovery efforts.
RECIPE SECTION, thanks to Sr Anna CROCK POT HOT CHICKEN WINGS Ingredients: 4 to 5 pounds chicken wings, with wing tips cut off 1 (12 ounce) bottle chili sauce or barbeque sauce. 1/3 cup lemon juice 1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce 2 tablespoon molasses 2 teaspoons salt 2 teaspoons chili powder 1/4 teaspoons hot pepper sauce 1/8 teaspoon garlic salt Directions: Place wings in crock pot. Combine all remaining ingredients, in a bowl and pour over chicken. Cook on low 6 to 8 hours or on high for 2 to 3 hours ( I prefer keeping the crock pot on low, since the wings seem more tender). Serves about six to eight people. Happy Appetite! Sr Anna PLEASE Let me know if you like the new recipe section!
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Ophelia
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Ophelia Dingbatter's News NO Sermon here, not for church, just jokes and fun for adults. |
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Good Morning, ! Today is Monday, February 6 Judging by the total lack of mail about the Super Bowl, it looks like most of you enjoyed the beautiful weather instead. I did. I got the results in the headline news. In case you are asked, The New York Giants beat the New England Patriots 21-17. If you know somebody, who would enjoy my jokes, please forward the entire newsletter. With any luck, some people will subscribe! Enjoy! Ophelia
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Here is ONE joke of the type you get in the 2 cent per day version. ($10 / year, $1 / month) The full version also has other goodies. Have you been good enough to deserve 2 cents per day? Treat yourself to the FULL VERSION!
A young couple had just returned from their honeymoon and were settling down in their new apartment. Coming home from work one night, the landlady met the man in the hallway. She said, "I have a couple of extra tickets to a play in town tonight, and I wonder if you and your bride would like to have them?" "I'll ask her," the young man responded. He opened his door and called out, "Honey, would you like to see 'Oliver Twist' tonight?" "Hey, Pal," she retorted. "If you show me one more trick with that thing, I'm going home to mother."
RECIPE SECTION, thanks to Sr Anna POTATO SKINS Ingredients: 4 large baking potatoes , baked 3 tablespoons vegetable oil 1 tablespoon grated parmesan cheese 1/2 teaspoon salt 1/4 teaspoon garlic powder 1/8 teaspoon pepper 8 slices bacon , cooked and crumbled 2 cups shredded cheddar cheese (approximately 8 ounces) ½ cup sour cream (if you wish) 4 chive onions , sliced in very small circles. Directions: Cut potatoes in half lengthwise; scoop out pulp and set aside (use for making mashed potatoes later) leaving 1/4 inch of potato in the shell. Place on a greased baking sheet. Combine oil, Parmesan cheese, salt, garlic powder and pepper and brush oil on potato skins. Bake at 475° for about 8 minutes and turn over. Bake for another 8 minutes or so and then turn right side up. Sprinkle bacon and cheddar evenly inside of skins. Bake 2 minutes longer or until cheese is melted. Top with chive onions, then add a dollop of sour cream on each, if desired. Happy Appetite! Sr Anna PLEASE Let me know if you like the new recipe section!
That's right! Use Pumpernickle bread or at least whole wheat bread!
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Since July 1, 2011,
the Ophelia Dingbatter's News is 2.7 cents per day,
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If the Subscriber buttons don't work on your browser,
you can accomplish the same with the donate button.
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ophelia@dingbatter.com |
Please help me stay online! |
See ya tomorrow!
Ophelia
ophelia@dingbatter.com
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Ophelia Dingbatter's News NO Sermon here, not for church, just jokes and fun for adults. |
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Good Morning, ! Today is Sunday, February 5 If you know somebody, who would enjoy my jokes, please forward the entire newsletter. With any luck, some people will subscribe! Enjoy! Ophelia
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Here is ONE joke of the type you get in the 2 cent per day version. ($10 / year, $1 / month) The full version also has other goodies. Have you been good enough to deserve 2 cents per day? Treat yourself to the FULL VERSION!
A wife in London went in to see a therapist and said, "I've got a big problem, doctor. Every time we're in bed and my husband climaxes, he lets out this ear splitting yell." "My dear," the shrink said, "that's completely natural. I don't see what the problem is." "The problem is," she complained, "It wakes me up!"
NEW RECIPE SECTION, thanks to Sr Anna SALSA DIP Ingredients: 3 tomatoes (one pound) 1/4 cup finely chopped red onions 1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro 1 jalapeño pepper, finely chopped 1/4 cup Italian Dressing {or instead of Italian Dressing, use1/8 cup oil, 1/8 cup white vinegar, 1/4 teaspoon salt, 1/8 teaspoon pepper, 1/8 teaspoon garlic powder.} 1 Large package Corn Chips: your favorite brand. Directions: Place all ingredients in a food processor, mix on pulse, until tomatoes are visibly about 1/4 inch by 1/4 inch, but not liquefied. You may wish to add salt and pepper to taste. ~*~Double the recipe if you have many guests.~*~ Happy Appetite! Sr Anna PLEASE Let me know if you like the new recipe section!
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Since July 1, 2011,
the Ophelia Dingbatter's News is 2.7 cents per day,
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If the Subscriber buttons don't work on your browser,
you can accomplish the same with the donate button.
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ophelia@dingbatter.com |
Please help me stay online! |
See ya tomorrow!
Ophelia
ophelia@dingbatter.com
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Ophelia Dingbatter's News NO Sermon here, not for church, just jokes and fun for adults. |
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Good Morning, ! Today is Saturday, February 4 Temperatures are supposed to go up to seven degrees above freezing, with only a 10 K wind. That sounds like a great day to clean up around the trailer and see what the last Chinook has deposited. Enjoy! Ophelia
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Here is ONE joke of the type you get in the 2 cent per day version. ($10 / year, $1 / month) The full version also has other goodies. Have you been good enough to deserve 2 cents per day? Treat yourself to the FULL VERSION!
An old farmer and his wife had a bunch of pigs, and every morning the farmer would head out to feed them. And every morning, he would see all the pigs screwing up a storm. He would get turned on by this and try to get back to the house in time to screw his wife but he always got soft before he got there. So one day, he took his hatchet and headed out to the pigpen. "No!" said his wife. "Don't kill those pigs!" "I'm not going to kill them. I'm moving the pen closer to the house."
NEW RECIPE SECTION, thanks to Sr Anna JELLO SHOOTERS Ingredients: 3 oz Jell-O (any flavor) 6 oz water 6 oz vodka Directions: Pour gelatin into a bowl. Add boiling water, stirring until the gelatin is dissolved. Let it cool to lukewarm. Stir in ice cold liquor. Refrigerate until cool. Pour into shot glasses, molds or a baking pan for a sheet of Jell-O to cut up once set. (I use the little bathroom cups, which are great for parties and football guests). Refrigerate until the liquid sets. (At least 2 hours, but overnight refrigeration is recommended) Serve cold. You can: Use the Jell-O flavor of your choice. Change the color with food coloring. Cut Jell-O shapes with cookie cutters. Pour the unset mix into molds. You really can have fun with this recipe. You can stretch the recipe with inclusions like strawberry bits or carrot pieces. You can cut two lengthwise grooves into a carrot, so that the cross section looks like a little fish, then cut the carrot into very thin slices, that look like goldfish. Happy Appetite! Sr Anna PLEASE Let me know if you like the new recipe section!
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Since July 1, 2011,
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If the Subscriber buttons don't work on your browser,
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ophelia@dingbatter.com |
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See ya tomorrow!
Ophelia
ophelia@dingbatter.com
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Ophelia Dingbatter's News NO Sermon here, not for church, just jokes and fun for adults. |
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Good Morning, ! Today is Friday, February 3 Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!Thank you, John! All the newsletters went out OK. If you ever miss mine, don't get into a huff, just tell me. I can always get DearWebby to re-send it or figure out, why you didn't get it. Enjoy! Ophelia
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Here is ONE joke of the type you get in the 2 cent per day version. ($10 / year, $1 / month) The full version also has other goodies. Have you been good enough to deserve 2.7 cents per day? Treat yourself to the FULL VERSION!
Ed and Ted went to the fair. They came across a small crowd gathered around a stall and went over to take a look. "What's going on?" Ed asked one of the crowd. "We're watching to see if some idiot can ride that bronco machine," he said nodding towards a fearsome looking machine. "Nobody has managed to stay on for the full minute yet, and there's a prize of $100 for anybody who can. "I can do that," Ed said confidently. "You can't," said Ted. "You'll get yourself killed if you try and ride that thing." "Watch this," said Ed and climbed aboard the bronco machine. The machine thrashed wildly, up and down, from side to side, around in circles but still a grim-faced Ed clung to its back. After 30 seconds the machine was bucking almost vertically and spinning until Ed was a blur. But when the minute was up, Ed was still on the machine's back acknowledging the cheers and cries from the small crowd. He dismounted, collected his winnings and rejoined Ted. "Where in hell did you learn to ride a bucking bronco like that?" Ted asked. "Remember three months ago," Ed said. "When your wife had whooping cough...?"
NEW RECIPE SECTION, thanks to Sr Anna Jello Pudding Shots INGREDIENTS: 1 small box. Jello pudding. My favorite is chocolate. 3/4 cup milk. 1/2 cup Irish cream. 1/4 cup kahlua. 1 8 oz.cool whip. DIRECTIONS: Mix all ingrediants together except cool whip like making pudding. Fold in cool whip. Put in 2 oz. Containers with lids. You can make these in different flavors. I have done some experimenting and come up with some good combinations. Chill and enjoy. Happy Appetite! Sr Anna PLEASE Let me know if you like the new recipe section!
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Since July 1, 2011,
the Ophelia Dingbatter's News is 2.7 cents per day,
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you can accomplish the same with the donate button.
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ophelia@dingbatter.com |
Please help me stay online! |
See ya tomorrow!
Ophelia
ophelia@dingbatter.com
| Please subscribe a friend to the Ophelia Dingbatter News |
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