Ophelia Dingbatter's News
NO Sermon here, and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for adults.

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Good Morning 
It's Friday, September 3, 2010
Once it warmed up today, we had a gorgeous day. 

We had a big discussion today at my neioghbor's BBQ about
Laptops and Netbooks. I had told anybody and everybody, who
would stand still long enough, that they should NOT buy those
small and slightly cheaper netbooks for their kids.

Well, guess what they did? They had all decided to not listen 
to a Blonde, and four neihgbors had bought Netbooks for
their kids. 

And guess what happened? Four neighbors are squinting and
cussing at little netbooks and getting cramps in their hands,
while their kids are using Mom's or Dad's big laptop for
school stuff. And probably games. After all, they got to beat 
dad at Farmville and Mom at Mafia. But the official excuse
of course is "school stuff".

Now I got a question for YOU!
Which font color do you like better?
Brown like in the top half, or navy like in the bottom half?

Enjoy!
Ophelia

Please vote for me at the EzineFinder
Thanks for voting for me! I DO appreciate it! And if you can help me get more subscribers, I would appreciate that even more! Ophelia Dingbatter
Feel free to adjust the font size by holding down the CTRL key and scrolling the mouse wheel.
"What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce." --- Mark Twain
Peter decided to go skiing with his buddy, Arthur. They loaded up Peter's station wagon and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. They pulled into a nearby farm house and asked the attractive lady of the house if they could spend the night. "I'm recently widowed," she explained, "and I'm afraid the neighbors will talk if I let you stay in my house." "Not to worry," Peter said, "we'll be happy to sleep in the barn." Nine months later, Peter got a letter from the widow's attorney, by double registered mail. He then went up to visit his friend Arthur and said, "Arthur, do you remember that good-looking widow at the farm we stayed at 9 months ago?" "Yes, I do." "Did you happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and have sex with her?" "Yes, I have to admit that I did." "Did you happen to use my name instead of telling her your name, and give her my business card, instead of yours?" Arthur's face turned red and he said, "Yeah, I'm afraid I did." "Well, thanks! She just died and left me everything!"

Farmville Guide If you play Farmville, you might as well win and get ahead! WAY ahead! Stop guessing and get the Real Farmville Guide!

I used to work at the local cable company. Back then we had to order Pay Per View movies manually for our customers. One day, a man called in to order the adult programming (of course this was my very first adult pay-per-view). It was obvious that he was embarrassed and wanted to get off of the phone as quickly as possible. Unfortunately, my computer would not process the order for about 5 minutes. Finally, after being very flustered and anxious to be done myself, the order went through. I just needed to confirm the order. Relieved and without thinking, I said, "Thank you sir, just let me know when you get it up." He didn't miss a beat and replied, "How much time do you have?
Ninety-year-old man: "Yes! After all these years, I've finally kicked the habit. I'm a free man. From now on, no more sex. I'm going to be celibate for the rest of my life!" Friend: "Wow! What happened? Are you concerned about declining health?" Ninety-year-old: "No, I'm concerned about my declining wealth. That darn Viagra was so expensive, I couldn't afford cigarettes!"
For clean, family safe humor and tech tips, try the newsletter
of my friend and coach, Dear Webby
Dear Webby's Humor Letter


Enough for today! See ya tomorrow! Ophelia ophelia@dingbatter.com ----------------------------------------- ---------ooooO----------------------- ---------( )-------Ooooo-------. ----------\ (---------( )-------- -----------\ \---------) /---------- ----------- \ _)--------/ /------------ -----------------------(_ /-------------- -----------------------------------------
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